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Slugger Mugger Poem

I have gained so much wicked delight creating an imaginary beast to be feared and loathed -and then writing a poem where this  creature became a central character in the telling. 

This is why I refer to the 'making' of poetry. Words and ideas are rehearsed and rolled around in the writer's mind before they emerge. You want them to fit the mood of the poem. You want the best words you can imagine to land on the page.

A lot of inward chuckling accompanied my writing of this poem.  I was also enjoying myself. Talk about conflicted. I feel this is my Frankenstein moment. This is my cautionary tale. Hope you like it. 

And, if you don't eat your greens- be afraid, be very afraid!


The Slugger-Mugger’s coming
The Slugger- Mugger’s coming
Sliding in on slime

The Slugger- Mugger’s coming
The conditions are just right
The moon is hidden by the clouds
There’s very little light

The Slugger- Mugger’s on the way
To your neighbourhood
Please don’t bother hiding
It won’t do you any good

The Slugger- Mugger’s searching
For kids who don’t eat greens
-they leave them on the plate
They hide them in their jeans

Spinach, peas and broccoli
Parsley, lettuce and beans
Shunned by fussy eaters
-such distressing scenes

The Slugger-Mugger will find them
It’s only a matter of time
The Slugger-Mugger’s ready
To splatter them in slime

Sticky-icky green slime
And Slugger-Mugger spit
It takes days to remove it
You need a cleaning kit

The Slugger-Mugger’s coming
Consider this a warning
If you don’t eat your greens
You might look slimy in the morning

The Slugger-Mugger’s coming
Sliding in on slime
If you refuse to eat your greens
You are running out of time


Alan j Wright

Image result for Slime monster


  1. I think I'll send this to my brother who (long ago) was finally caught hiding the greens (especially peas & green beans) on a small platform under the table. They had been there a long time! Oh! You've shown slugger-mugger' attacks with glee, but I love those greens; he won't get me! Fun, Alan!

    1. As you will appreciate Linda there is often a small degree of fact in fictional accounts, and so it is here. Glad to hear you are safe. I too eat my greens.

  2. Ha--your poem made me laugh! Lots of fun.

    1. A laugh is good for us Buffy. Glad you enjoyed my Friday poem.

  3. Ha! I was just about to tell the tale of my sister hiding peas on a ledge under the table - only to read that Linda had a near identical tale! Thanks for the laugh and the memory.

    1. Such stories point to the devious things we did to avoid those foods we could not abide as children Sally. Glad it gave you a laugh.

  4. Phew - I'm safe now, though as a green-phobic child I was probably just moments away from a slugger-mugger attack! ;-)

  5. Slugger Mugger spit! Ugh! That's enough to make a kid pull the veg out of their pocket and give it one more try.

  6. I can see why you chuckled as you wrote this one. I laughed as I read it!

    1. Thanks Kay. I did very such making making this poem, so it pleases me to think others are also getting a laugh form it too.


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