It is often said that as writers and poets- 'First we imitate, then we innovate.'
When I first wrote a haibun poem I followed the structure and form without question. Since that time I have written numerous poems in this classic Japanese poetry form.
Among my personal poetry collection I own a copy of Robert Wood Lynn's 'Mothman Apologia' In this anthology the poet innovates with a variety of layouts for his poems. He writes a series of ten elegies where there is a complete absence of punctuation and adopts layouts with multiple blocks of justified text. He is challenging visual norms. These considered actions focused my reading.
All this brings me to this week's poem. I have presented it as a haibun, but have consciously removed punctuation a la Robert Wood Lynn to make it a hybrid presentation.
My poem tells the story of a coal delivery man in England in the 1920's. 'Alfred, The Coalman Cometh' could also be categorized as docupoetry, or an ode, perhaps. Some degree of reading and research was required in the making of this poem.
Alfred Wright was in fact, my great uncle and lived in Kent, England.
Alfred, The Coalman,
Cometh
Alfred delivered coal a coalman with a
horse drawn cart a cart special for its purpose the
coalman delivered to homes in sacks often arriving at the rear of houses where
a coal bunker was located the sacks packed in
hundredweights of coal were extremely heavy to carry the bunker a flat platform
allowed coalmen to drag rather than lift the heavy bags onto their backs removable
ropes round the sack kept them in place while the cart was moving blinkers were
always worn by workhorses on the streets blocking anything but a straight ahead view for them it
kept them calmer more controllable those horses steered gently with a slight
pull on the bit in their mouth although they usually got to know a delivery
route and the way back to base without additional action from the driver nose
bags filled with food were worn round the horses necks so they could eat at
their leisure as Alfred left customers might tip him two pennies a lot of money
back then Alfred might respectfully doff his hat in acknowledgement of the tip such
tips presumed he would remember to be careful not to touch the walls or knock
anything over next time being a coalman was dirty work for men like Alfred and
the heavy bags they hefted were dusty and dirty too such labourious demanding
work
The coalman cometh
Toting cumbersome coal bags
Warming hearth and home
It is Poetry Friday and our host this time is Carol Varsalona. Carol alerts us the 'Art of Summering. Summering is defined as a state of mind that brings feelings of joy and relaxation. It revolves around the best of summertime and the ability to savour those feelings year-round.
Thanks for the glimpse into a coalman's workday! Glad to think about their work, how heavy the bags were, how dirty, how essential. I like how the form echoes the blinkers on a horse.
ReplyDeleteThanks you for your remarks, Tabatha. Sharp observation on your part regarding the form and the horse's blinkers. The work of the coalman was certainly laborious.
DeleteAlan, a coalman's job was difficult and dirty. I certainly liked your haibun poem. It brought me back to a little girl wamdering in my Nonnie's mystery basement. Besides canned items I found double doors that opened outwards just for coalmen to load up the house for chilly days. I also like haibuns but never tried to write one in a hybrid stage. Thank you as always for sharing different formats for readers to try.
ReplyDeleteThank you for your appreciative comments, Carol. Your own memory made for interesting reading on my part. Easy to visualise.
DeleteAfter reading Tabatha's comment, I went back and read again. She is right! The arrangement of words echoed the blinkers on the horse and helped me stay focus. I also love the line "toting cumbersome coal bags" for its music .
ReplyDeleteThank you for your response, Rose. Much appreciated. Glad you heard some music in the words.
DeleteThis poem put me hauntingly in the shoes of the coal man, hefting heavy sacks of coal and serving others. Probably a thankless job. The form was a visual experience as well. I love that you are exploring your ancestry through haibun poetry.
ReplyDeleteIt was no doubt a demanding job, Margaret, as you write. You have reminded me that exploring my ancestry through poetry is something I have done before, so a trend has begun.
DeleteFascinating story from your own family history! What a treasure! Like Tabatha, I immediately felt blinkered like the horse by the margins and the lack of punctuation. Brilliant craft moves!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Mary Lee. So glad you enjoyed my efforts to go out on a limb.
DeleteAlan, Firstly, I think this must have been difficult to write as it was difficult to read. I do love, however, that you focused on a real person and a relative of yours, no less! Thank you for sharing. It was refreshing to realize (from your words) that writing is work - for all of us - no matter how skilled or vibrant the inspiration. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Carol for your considered comments. Much appreciated, as always. Yes, it was a challenging writing project, but I was happy to test my intentions and the fact that it concerned a relative of mine, made me want to be respectful and accurate- hence the need to research.
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